??????

She is just trying to do the right thing.... not to impress or please anyone, except Allah SWT and herself....  She just need to find peace with people who had wronged her and she had wronged them. Her intention is just to forgive and forget and after that she just want to put everything behind and carry on with her life quietly and peacefully. She knows why she does what she did.... she hurt a lot of people.... she feel she need to apologise, because she scared if Allah will not redha with her.... 

Suddenly, people questioned her sincerity, her intention & a WHY was mentioned.... How is she going to handle it.... her feelings towards those who questioned her.... she feel hurt, angry and sad.... but she knows she need to brush it off those feeling aside.... she feel like defending herself, act the way she used to act before.... but she knows, what she did is only for Allah SWT... so she have to stop herself, she have to hold her anger, her pain of being hurt & her sadness she swallow it deeply and she whisper silently "Lahawlawalla quwataillabillah.." Let Allah handle it for her.... she doesn't want to create any more disharmony among them.... she wants to die in peace & with redha Allah..

Let it be... she wanted to change to be a better person, not a person she used to be.... she has to be strong, its not easy, but she will keep trying.... Allah wants her to be better, that is why Allah allow this to happen.... Alhamdullillah.... "Ya Allah, guide me, give me strength & patience to face your trials for my emaan & taqwa."

Please Allah & that's all that matter most.